Archive for May, 2008

the chinese got it right.

Posted in autism, life in general on May 15, 2008 by askthesky

I was reading a post from one of my GFCFSF diet autism moms today about how she was watching her son play, and realizing how “autistic” he was that day.  She said it so well- you know your kid has autism, but it’s still your child, it’s not that you forget, but sometimes you blur the line between their personality and their autistic traits, out of self-preservation, maybe.  Anyway, I’ve been feeling like that this week, too.  We’ve had a lot of violence, and more at school that’s new- directed towards his classmates in addition to his teachers.  It’s just exhausting, this. 

At the end of the post I just mentioned was this quote, and while I’m not sure it’s true, and I don’t speak Chinese, I love it too much to research it and find that it’s not accurate-

“Perserverance: to continue on with a knife in your heart.”  -Chinese language

Since I’ve been gone, away

Posted in musings on May 2, 2008 by askthesky

I gotta be honest, I ain’t missin you at all.  Kidding!  Miss you! 

Here’s an essay in pictures of what’s happened since I last graced you with my presence (snort). 

Zander had his 4th birthday, which was full of balloons, not too many presents (thank you, family!), and lots and lots and lots of bubbles. 

Zander's Birthday at HomeZander's birthday 2

We went to the yarn shop fundraiser, where Miss Sue (or, as Zander calls her, Miss Suess) had a ton of baked goods, happy knitters, and most importantly, eyeball stickers.  They were meant for the balloons, but were much more fun on shirts.  Let this be my public statement of unending gratitude for Sue and everyone who chipped in for Zander- there was over $1000 raised, some of which has already been put to excellent use, like covering our last installment for our organic CSA share, and a long-coveted communication board that is already working like a dream for him.  I highly recommend it, if you can drop the $$$ (and it’s not cheap!). 

I’ve also been taking more time for me, which sometimes, if I’m lucky, includes such lovely things as roasted vegetables, good friends, and red wine.  Sometimes, it’s even all three:

…and then there’s all the mindfulness I’ve been practicing.  It’s always seemed kind of counter-intuitive to practice noticing- I was always left wondering why it isn’t an automatic response to all the glory around us every day of our lives.  We all know it most certainly is not, especially when there’s a small person tugging at your solitude at all times.  So, lately, I’ve been trying to focus on one thing: the weather.  I remember one day when I was in college (Fluff, this was when we lived in Breton, or whatever that building was called) so clearly- I had gotten home from class at about 3 in the afternoon.  It was Spring semester, probably March, and it was just warm enough to open the window directly above my bed a crack and let the coolest of breezes in.  What followed was hands-down the best nap I’ve ever taken.  I remember the blanket, the color of the window frame, the sounds of people outside, the hysterical laughter of my roomate Ligeia, all like it just happened, and I think the memories stem from that breeze.  So, on days like this:

… I’m standing up and taking notice as I cook and clean and tend to that solitude thief below me.  It makes all the difference in the world.